Sep 8th, 2015
However good our lives our, or however good we think they are, we are all likely at some point to come across events and situations which will undermine the secure environment in which we live, overwhelming our ability to cope, such as:-
• When we are confronted with unwelcome and unexpected sometimes life changing experience or difficulties that may feel overwhelming.
• When events befall us to the extent that we lose any sense of place or purpose in life.
• When we regularly ask ourselves the question, “Why does this always happen to me?” or “Why do I always end up feeling bad, like this?”
• We may feel ourselves changing and growing without knowing why or what to do about it.
Alternatively, no matter how much we try, we may have always had some underlying sense of not fitting in, not belonging or not being good enough – a sense which sabotages our well-being and hopes for a happy life.
Either of the situations mentioned are bound to be seen as a threat to our sense of security; this response coming from deep within our primeval ancestry where threat was constant and we relied on the fight, flight or freeze responses, the nature of which can be easily observed in animals, in the wild.
In these modern times, our reactions to life issues are more likely to be driven by emotional responses, fuelled by the dynamic interaction of thought and time past, in the form of memory, or time future, in the form of worry about what might happen. This sense of threat tends to manifest, in the modern world, as conditions such as having a sense of confusion, anger, anxiety, stress, abandonment, loss, sadness and grief.
I am an experienced counsellor, with over 10 years of practice, and in that time have helped many people to overcome difficulties in a way that has enabled them to find new meaning and purpose in life.
I have helped clients to overcome difficult experiences such as childhood abuse and emotional neglect, addictions (alcohol, substance and sexual addictions), anger, anxiety, bereavement, loss and general distress.
As a qualified Couples and Relationship Counsellor, I see that it is helpful to recognise that the ‘relationship’ people create develops a form of existence and integrity of its own which is quite apart from the expectations, aspirations and fears of the individual which can, in any event, change over time. Not once in my years of counselling experience have I met a client whose intention was for a meaningful relationship to be wasted. The general reality is that the intense pressures of modern day living can cause any of us to lose sight of that which we most treasure, namely our personal relationships.
The foundation of my Couples Counselling practice is centred on the essence of the needs of the relationship and the responsibility that the individuals have for it, along with their individual expectations of it. This approach avoids a tendency to blame or shame individuals and so encourages a constructive way of working, so that issues can be explored in a non-confrontational way. My core approach to this specialist area of therapy also integrates important aspects of communication and development skills, using Emotional Intelligence and Emotional Literacy techniques.
In engaging in counselling with me, you are assured of a safe, confidential and supportive environment which meets the professional expectations of the British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy, of which I am an accredited member MBACP (Accred).
I will not charge you for any initial exploratory discussion or assessment as it is important to me to establish that you are happy to work with me, understand how I work and what outcomes you are seeking, before you make any financial or contractual commitment.
My fee for working with individual clients is £40 for a 1-hour session and £50 for each couples session. I do reserve a small number of opportunities for fee reductions, subject to circumstances.