Aug 18th, 2014
The undermentioned client stories are published with the client’s full permission and have been anonimised. My testimonials page covers anonymised selected client reflections and are published with their permission,
Ray contacted me to resolve what he’d been told were his anger management issues and after an initial discussion we agreed to meet initially for 6 sessions to explore this with an expectation to then continue, after progress had been reviewed.
It quickly became clear that he wasn’t an intrinsically angry man but had become increasingly frustrated by people close to him, who did not understand or respect the values with which he had been raised and which he had, in turn, encouraged in his own children. He had always had a tendency to ‘speak his mind’ and this caused problems when his values clashed with those of people around him.
His positive values of respect, courtesy and co-operative working were identified along with an exploration of how ‘speaking his mind’ was not always the most effective strategy for resolving differences, or getting his views understood. We then identified more appropriate future strategies and monitored their effectiveness, with positive improvements soon seen.
The core work was completed in 4 weeks and we staggered the remaining two sessions, to give him time to practice and integrate what he’d learned about himself.
Freda engaged with me after a life changing experience which profoundly challenged the way she was living her life. I created a secure environment in which she felt safe enough to explore her history in a way that helped find context and meaning to her experiences along with new understanding and direction for her future and that of her children.
We explored her emotional confusion, where authentic feelings of sadness and grief had been taken hostage by anger which she had directed towards herself for many years, this manifesting as destructive attitudes and behaviours. This exploration was powerfully facilitated in local woodland where the trees and landscape became a living metaphor, mirroring her life’s experiences. New growth, in the form of saplings growing from a fallen tree trunk also served as a motivation to a better future, as we considered Nature’s resilience in its battle to survive and adapt to its environment.
“Ian and Jane’s story”
Ian and Jane engaged with me for relationship advice and couples counselling after experiencing relationship problems when they started living together, after having enjoyed a number of happy years together, albeit mainly weekends and holidays based.
I worked with them to create a safe and supportive environment where they could each understand what it meant to them, individually, to be in a good relationship and to explore and share their expectations and concerns in a way that helped them to understand one another better and to overcome the barriers that threatened their future. A spin off benefit of this work was that their communication and assertiveness skills improved with each other and other key people.
I worked with each of them separately, to help them to understand where some of their individual personality characteristics and behaviours came from and to learn and integrate new ways to avoid and overcome the problems that these factors caused. I also helped them to identify their personal strengths and resources, to understand how they could be used to good effect to support their relationship.
Having overcome their relationship difficulties, their confidence in the relationship grew and their commitment strengthened to a point where they felt secure enough to start a family.
Graham had not been able to get his need for support and understanding for his anxiety issues met, within a primary healthcare setting and his healthcare professionals recommended that he seek alternative private counselling. He chose to work with me since I had a good understanding of the business orientated and general life issues about which he had become very anxious to a point where he was becoming withdrawn, to the detriment of his general well-being, life and relationships.
I was able to quickly establish a good working relationship with Graham, through which I was able to help him to find context and a sense of proportion to the various matters which were undermining his hopes for a full and meaningful life.
After 8 sessions, Graham’s medical advisors were able to start a dialogue and set a timescale to consider managing away his medications.